Cheers.

Here's to my head teaching week.

Here's to two projects for that other class.

Here's to living up my last week and a half in Logan.

Here's to that 12 page paper due on Monday.

Here's to the bridal shower I'm planning for my best friend.

Here's to being productive.

Here's to some extra time to dedicate to myself and Heavenly Father.

I have issues.

How am I ever going to name one of my children if I can't even name a blog?
Or pick out a birthday present for my mom?
Or think of the right thing to say in a letter?
Or decide what my mission scripture should be?
Or figure out what to get my best friend for her wedding?
Or pick out something to wear?

Just Keep Pedaling

Just Pedal

At first, I saw God as my observer, my judge, keeping

track of the things I did wrong, so as to know whether

I merited heaven, or hell when I die. He was out there,

sort of like a president. I recognized His picture

when I saw it, but I really didn't know Him. 

But later on when I met Christ, it seemed as though

life were rather like a bike ride, but it was a tandem

bike. and I noticed that Christ was in the back

helping me pedal. 

I don't know just when it was that He suggested we

changed places, but life has not been the same since.

When I had control. I knew the way. It was rather boring,

but predictable...It was the shortest distance

between two points. 

But when He took the lead, He knew delightful long

cuts, up mountains, and through rocky places at

breakneck speeds, it was all I could do to hang

on! Even though it looked like madness, He said,

 "Pedal!" 

I worried and was anxious and asked, "Where are

you taking me?" He laughed and didn't answer, and I

started to learn to trust. I forgot my boring life and

entered into the adventure. And when I'd say, "I'm

scared," He'd lean back and touch my hand. 

He took me to people with gifts that I needed,

 gifts of healing, acceptance and joy. They gave me

their gifts to take on my journey, my Lord's and mine.

And we were off again. 

He said, "Give the gifts away; they're extra baggage,

too much weight." So I did, to the people we met, and

I found that in giving I received, and still our burden

was light. 

I did not trust Him, at first, in control of my life.

I thought He'd wreck it; but He knows bike secrets,

knows how to make it bend to take sharp corners, jumps

to clear high rocks, fly to shorten scary passages.

 

 I am learning to shut up and pedal in the

strangest places, and I'm beginning to enjoy the cool

breeze on my face with my delightful

constant companion, Christ. 

And when I'm sure I just can't do anymore,

He smiles and says...

 " Just Pedal."

Author Unknown

The Happenings

It's summer.
I'm slowly hacking away at my 2013 summer bucket list.
It's a little hard when I have 5.5 hours of school everyday.
And a little homework on top of that.
Four hours of that is spent in preschool.
What can I say, I love children.
I love....what they say.
What they do.
When they laugh.
How they question.
When they whip out words like nocturnal, gravity, and thermometer.
How they smile.
Their imaginations.
When they sing primary songs.
The life of a five-year-old seems very simple to us.
But their world is all they know.
They are discovering, growing, developing, learning, and becoming themselves.
It is not a simple thing.
It is an incredible thing.
Woah. Tangent.
What else....
One year ago I was at Oakcrest starting the best summer of my life.
I'm missing it like crazy.
Seriously.
I miss it so much.
Friday is Friends and Family night.
I can't wait.
My sister is coming home from Africa this week.
I miss her like crazy.
My best friend is coming home from his mission in less than a week.
I can't wait for a Michael Zajac hug.
I can't even believe that two years are over.
I got snapchat.
Bad idea.
I love it.
My best friend is getting married.
I still can't believe that.
I LOVE the temple.
I'm leaving in 77 days.

On a run.

Today I went on a run with my roommate. 

We talked about beauty. About what the world says that beauty is. 

We talked about how sometimes we compare ourselves to others and feel like our bodies aren't skinny enough or we don't look beautiful enough. 

We talked about how when we feel this way we feel distance between ourselves and God. This is what Satan wants. He wants us to make our looks our priority. 

This leads to eating disorders, lack of self-confidence and self-worth, depression, obsessions over exercising, financial difficulty, addiction, pride, family disintegration, and so many more things that make Satan smile. 

And Guess what! The flawless body that the world says you need is NOT realistic. We can't all be a size zero, have clear skin, a big chest, perfect hair, and designer clothes. That kind of beauty is unattainable and even if you do achieve it, it won't bring you true happiness.

We talked about how we are so grateful for the gospel and know that we have a Heavenly Father who loves us and looks for Deep Beauty. He made us the way that we are and gave us this wonderful body. 

Don't hate something that God gave you. Don't abuse that gift he has given you. 

He loves you they way that you are. He sees the whole picture. He sees the person you were in the pre-mortal life and he sees the person you can become in the eternities. 

Yes, you should strive to look your best and take care of your body, but it should not be your highest priority. 

Your highest priority should be making God proud and living worthy to go to the temple and be in His presence. Live so that you can Be Accepted of the Lord.

Live in a way that you are Beautiful to Him. 

I had a precious experience at Oakcrest last summer. It was something that one of my girls said during testimony meeting. It was something along these lines. 

"Christ is perfect. When He sees us, he sees the parts of us that are like him. Therefore, in us, he sees perfection." 

I know that I'm not perfect but that is wonderful! I have a life to live to become more like my Savior. I can become more and more like him every single day! It doesn't matter what my pant size or how many pimples I have on my face. He created me. 

And he made me Beautiful.

Guess what.

You are beautiful.

Ambiguity

Ambiguous
adjective

lacking clearness or definiteness; obscure; indistinct, 
open to or having several possible meanings or interpretations



Some people have told me that I tend to be ambiguous or vague on the internet (i.e. my blog, facebook). I guess that sometimes I need to express myself but I don't want everyone knowing exactly what is going through my head. Other times, I do it subconsciously. For example, about a month and a half ago I used the word "Submitted" on Facebook. Nothing more than that. I was expressing how excited I was that I had submitted my final teaching portfolio. Apparently it could be taken a different way. There were some people who thought that I had submitted my mission papers. When I wrote that word on Facebook it didn't even occur to me that people might take it in the wrong way. Simple seemed like the way to go. But I'm not complaining. It could have been a worse mistake. Not to mention, I ended up submitting my mission papers a month later so all is well. Some of the people who are closest to me usually understand what my ambiguous ramblings are about. If they don't, then they usually ask me what in the world I'm talking about. Sometimes its kind of nice to know that even though most of the world doesn't have a clue what you are saying, there are a few people you love so much and know you enough to know exactly what you are saying. 

So now I have these feelings I want to express. But how do I write something so ambiguous that even the people who know me best won't know what I'm saying?

one hundred days.

My name is Lauren Kasteler.

My name is Lauren Kasteler.

I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

I am 21 years old.

I am a missionary.

I will be serving in the Florida Jacksonville Mission.

I depart in 110 days.

I will serve for 18 months.

I will preach the gospel in English.

I can't wait.

I can't wait to share the gospel with people in Florida and Georgia.

They need to know the glorious news of the restored Gospel.

They need to know that families can be together.

That Christ already paid the ultimate price.

And because of their Savior's Atonement, they are never alone.

They need to know that God loves them.

He wants them to be happy.

They need to know that God speaks to prophets today.

They need to know that the Gospel of Jesus Christ will give them joy.

They need to know that the priesthood is on the earth and can bless their lives.

They need to know that they can pray to their Father at any moment.

That he listens.

And that he will always answer.

They need to know that He has a plan for them.

A plan that will mold and polish them in to the daughter or son they can become.

They need to know the truth.

I'm going to tell them.

I Choose Him

Here is a song that has been dear to my heart ever since I heard it.

There is one part in particular that really stood out to me a couple weeks ago and I have thought about it often since then. It starts at 1:38. These are the lyrics to this part.

He's given me His trust, so I'll be strong enough,
To run from a dangerous touch, I don't need that kind of love,
I don't need that crutch, He's given me his trust.

God trusts me. 
He knows that I am strong enough 
to run away from the things that 
will not bring me eternal happiness. 
He knows that I will choose Him 
and his ways. 
His trust allows me to make my own decisions. 
He isn't going to force me to keep the commandments 
and be worthy of eternal life, 
but He trusts me to make those decisions on my own. 
It doesn't matter what the world thinks of me.
The only person I need to please is my Heavenly Father.

I choose His way. 
I choose His plan.
I choose to keep the commandments. 
I choose the temple.
I choose to be with my family forever.
I choose to be a witness of Him at all times, in all things, and in all places.
I choose to serve him always.
I choose His love.
I choose joy. 
I choose HIM.

one of those moments.

thursday was my last day student teaching the sixth graders. i also had a job interview in ogden. then, that night i went to the sunrise elementary kindergarten opera. my kindergarteners have been working on this opera for months. did you know that kindergarteners could write, try out for parts, rehearse, and perform an opera? well, they can. and it was incredible. so incredible. it was one of those moments. one of those moments that remind you of your passion for teaching. they put so much work into it and they owned it. if you watched it you would be surprised that they were kindergarteners. i was so impressed with their performance. i'm glad that i had a small part. after, i went up to the classroom to congratulate them and another one of those moments happened. one of those moments where you have 15 to 20 white-faced kindergarteners surrounding you all trying to give you a hug and telling you how much they miss you. one of those moments when you miss them so much. one of those moments that make all the work that goes into teaching worth it.

one of those moments.